The trooper saw me speeding
And weaving just a touch
Driving a little erratic
But really not too much
I saw the flashing lights behind
I heard the siren's wail
At first I didn't pay much mind
But my attention was soon centered
My foot came down hard on the brake
The squad car couldn't stop
We soon ended up, he on the bottom, me on top
we two only cuts and bruises had
Me in handcuffs, he shaking his head
As we waited for transportation
Finally he raised his eyes to me
And this is the question he asked
Are you drunk? What possessed you to drive so?
I looked right back, and in all honesty replied
I've not had a single drink sir, A little smile I tried
The simple explanation is, I broke my shoelace
It was an extra long lace I had on
Somehow it became wrapped in the throttle linkage
Every time I raised my foot, my car became a rocket
The swerving you saw was my feeble attempts
To try to free my foot by hand
I couldn't see when my head was down
But I corrected As soon as could be
At long last the shoelace finally broke
I only braked so hard when my foot came down free
That was why you ran into me
See, that's the culprit, that darn shoelace

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